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god's plansWhat an eventful year it has turned out to be. It was one hell of a roller coaster ride, the most dramatic one I ever had in my life. Full of lots of downs and downs and a few ups. It was the year that almost reached a nadir in terms of everything I had in life; job, money, my friends, my identity, and many many things that defined me and my life, socially. Almost everything was given up or taken away, depending on the way one looks at it.

I gave up my full-time job (or was forced to) at the beginning of this year due to some adverse situations. Blessed that I always was, I got work-from-home option for three months to avoid resignation. Still, nothing could be done much and in March 2012, I quit. Among many other reasons, the need for a sabbatical was a dominating factor. After 9 years of work, I wanted a different perspective on life. Never wanted my life to be defined merely by my work and hence, I am happy I took that decision.

To earn my bread and butter, I took up part-time options and freelancing. This gave me a life I was carving for. Ample time at home and with myself, less work pressure, freedom from negativity and no more interference of all and sundry about what I should do with my life.

However, pitfalls of this decision were more than the perks. There was less money to survive and the social identity (about which I never cared though) was lost in this mayhem. The question marks were many, sarcasm was evident in everyone’s words.

Thirty-two, single, and now unemployed, the statistics were not getting any better. It hardly mattered to me but somewhere affected my family. Though they always supported me fully and gave me the strength to go ahead, but still as my parents and siblings, their concern was natural.

My plan was clear: after a laid-back 2012, shift base to Delhi in January 2013 for a full-fledged professional life and earn well to lead a single woman’s life. But before January could come, God intervened, as he always does whenever I dare to plan. I got engaged, against all hopes and odds! Life took a 360-degree turn.

What I had planned was thrown down the drain and God gave me a new life altogether, something I was not anticipating at all. Fortunately, “I am loving it!” and at this moment the only thing my heart is saying is, “God’s plans are always better than ours!”

 

 

Life is all about learning what the title of the post says, ‘How to turn obstacles into an opportunity’, and it’s not so easy.  But if  you learn it once, life is fun and full of rich experiences.

My life too has been a roller coaster one, with ups and downs in plenty. Only when  things go beyond control,  you realize you are nobody. Life gives you what it has to…you like it or not. Strangely, my life at the moment  is just what i had always wanted, except a few things. And still, these few things make all the difference. It’s very strange but I have to admit, in the past few months, whatever i asked for was given to me. I said God, please do this, and it happened. God , please this too, and amen…i was amused, but the feeling  was shortlived. H gave me all i wanted but took away some of the things i had. Got the point? I kept getting all i wanted and kept losing some of the things i had.  God is a smart player, he never gives you 100 %.

The past few months have been very trying, and it’s usually in the bad times that you learn the most. The cycle usually goes like this:

1. Something bad happens (only as per our perception, you later realize it is a part of God’s larger plan)

2. You refuse to accept it, find it extremely tough to deal with

3. You then do everything under the sun to change it

4. You crave for things to be normal

5. All your efforts fail to  move things even to an inch

6. Slowly and slowly you realize it’s beyond your control

7. Gradually, you start accepting the way things are

8. You still question your life, and millions other things, and start looking for answers, rising above the mundane living.

9. You learn patience, gratitude, how to be calm even in trying times and endless other things that nothing else but suffering can teach you. ( you realize it only later)

10. And after that long period of suffering, one fine day  you come to know that you have started loving this new life of yours, and it’s just a matter of time before you realize, “Hey, this is what i had always dreamt of! I so badly wanted my life to be like this. Thank God for this wonderful life.”

11. What was it, how did it happen, u felt you were suffering and today you are rejoicing in its outcome.

12. That’s because your suffering was the transition period, nobody loves change, we fear it, we prefer living our life the way it has been for all these years just coz we fear failing, what if things don’t happen the way i want? What will people say? What will…and many wills…

13. That’s why God takes charge, as he knows you will prefer same life rather than experimenting with it.  He wants you to experience everything, not just good but the bad too and all that in-between.  He wants to give you something priceless, and he knows you won’t be able to get it for yourself because of our limited perception.

14.  To get something worthwhile, even the suffering has to have some level.  And it’s something we never chose for ourselves, the timings are entirely his.

Today is Valentine’s Day. Don’t know if you had expected a post from me or no, but I expected one from me. Reason: I love life, I love love and I passionately love all the special people who are there in my life, and most importantly, they all love me more than me. I am far too imperfect for all of them.

Of course I don’t believe in just having one day to express love, but don’t mind celebrating Valentine’s Day either. I love every celebration of life, from enjoying a cup of tea in solitude to partying with friends. And oh, if anyone is reading this post expecting to know about the valentine kind of love in my life, I am sorry to disappoint you, and even myself. I have none. Strange na, especially when I love love so much. But that’s something beyond me.

That apart, my life, touchwood, is full of love. I have so much of love around me that I secretly fear losing it, God forbid. May be its coz of this love that I find life so beautiful, in spite of its struggles and pressures and complications. Another thing is that I don’t have many people in my life who are very close to me. They are just a few, I mean the people who are part of my daily life and close to my heart. Everyone is special in my life, but if we talk about the ones who form my everyday life, I can count them on my fingers. And to the extent of boring you again (I have been asked by many not to write emotional posts, but this is my blog, not your newspaper), I would like to thank those lovely people who make my life lovable, that’s what Valentine’s day is for na?

Besides my family, the most lovable component of my life, I would like to thank all my friends for being there and adding to the quality of my life. Special thanks to my roommates who have given me a home away from home, a support system to smile in the midst of sorrows, their shoulders when I needed them, and for being so good that it strengthened by belief that life is full of good people too.

Today, it’s the birthday of one of my roomies too. May god bless her and give her someone to love too. And ahh, birthday reminds me of one strange fact of our lives, which I am embarrassed to admit on this love day, but not at all ashamed. Most of my friends are above 30 years and unmarried, including my roommates. Sigh! What a way to end the Valentine’s Day post.

A B’day that was!

B’day celebrations lasted a bit long this time. Not much fanfare but yes, a quiet celebration with the ones who matter. As the clock stuck 12, came a surprise cake, courtesy my roommates. Beautifully decorated, my favourite chocolate flavour, plus loads of their love. And yes, glasses of Glucon D to make up for the absence of cold drink, which they forgot to arrange. It was fun and special.

Went home in the morning, where a small puja was arranged. Then, a special lunch by mom and a few guests in the evening. The highlight was, cake had ‘My Soulitude’ written on it, courtesy my brother. So sweet of him and so much for the blog excitement. Next day in the evening, went out for dinner with friends. Just the four of us, me, my two roommates and one more friend. Had too much of fun. On the eve of birthday, had a small celebration with some other friends.

This was it, my birthday, which is gone now, leaving memories behind, and making me another year older. With every year added, I feel more happy (touchwood), more contended, more comfortable with life and more comfortable with myself and my existence.

Happy New Year!

 

 

Thanks to all of you who bothered to read my blog. Today, on the first day of this 2012, I wish you all truck loads of good wishes, good times, good health and the bestest life. No, don’t want you to read blog today, so not writing a post. Enjoy the day!